The Trouble With Time
by prepare4trouble
Summary: Everyone goes back to the 21st century to stop an old friend of Fry's from making the mistake of his life


_I wrote most of this a few years ago, then abandoned it, planning to write an ending and re-write the whole thing as prose. I did the ending, but I decided I quite liked it as it was. I hope you enjoy it, please leave a review.  
I don't own any futurama characters_

The Trouble With Time

_Sun just coming up. Fry and Bender are walking down the street. There are not many cars or people around._

Fry: Can't we just go to work? I'm sure you've got some beers there.  
Bender: I drank them all yesterday. Quit worrying Fry, they're not going to go without us.  
Fry: We're already a half hour late, they've probably already gone  
Bender: Then a few more minutes won't make any difference

_They walk on for a few seconds and pass a bar with a neon sign saying 'open 7am-5am every day'_

Fry: Too bad it's five after five.

_They walk on a bit longer_

Fry: Look, Bender, there's no way we're going to find anywhere open at this time in the morning. Lets just go to work and see if there's anything there.  
Bender: OK, but I don't see what you're so bothered about, you hated the moon last time we went.  
Fry: Yeah, but I kinda want to go again now I know what to expect. Plus I want to find Neil Armstrong's footprints again  
Bender: If we miss it it's their fault anyway, who wants to go at this time in the morning anyway?  
Fry: Me, they're opening a new ride, I want to be the first one to have a go!

_Bender shrugs and they turn around and go back the way they were going. A little further down the road we see another bar that they would have reached if they had carried on walking. Above the door it says 'open all day' _

_Fry and Bender arrive at work_

Bender: We're here, losers!

_There is no answer. Bender sits down and opens a can of beer. Fry looks like he's about to say something about making them go all over looking for a bar when he had some cans, but he doesn't. Fry goes into the other room to look for Leela and everyone else._

Fry: Anyone still here? Aww man! This is typical. They must have gone to the moon to ride the new ride and left us behind because we were late.  
Bender: (o/s) They've left us a note. 'Gone to the moon to ride the new ride. Left you behind because you were late'

_Fry goes back into the room Bender's in._

Fry: This sucks! They could have waited, they know how much I wanted to go  
Bender: Yeah we were only an hour and a half late without calling.  
Fry: Some friends they are. Y'know, it's times like this I miss my old friends back in the 20th century.  
Bender: Your old friends? You had friends before you met us?  
Fry: (nods) Of course I did.  
Bender: And you miss them even though I'm here?  
Fry: (nods again) Sometimes. But they're all dead now, so I might as well forget about them.  
Bender: You sure they're dead?  
Fry: Unless they were frozen or lived for a thousand years, yeah.  
Bender: Or had their heads preserved in jars…

_Fry looks at Bender for a moment then turns around and runs out the door_

Bender: where are you going?!  
Fry: The head museum

_At the head museum, Fry and Bender and walking around, Fry is looking at all the heads trying to find a familiar face._

Bender: This is pointless. You'll never find anyone you know like this, it'll take forever. Besides in your time only successful people got their heads preserved in jars, how many of your friends would you call successful?  
Fry: They might have gotten successful after I was frozen. I had a few friends who wanted to be rock stars. Maybe they made it.  
Bender: There's an easier way to do this. (shouting) OK heads, listen up! My buddy and I are looking for anyone who know a loser delivery boy called Fry at the end of the 20th century.

_There is no answer._

Bender: No one? OK, let's go skinbag.  
Fry: I wasn't a loser.

_Fry and Bender start to leave when a voice shouts from a bottom shelf._

Voice: Not Philip Fry? The pizza delivery boy?  
Fry: (excited) Yeah! Yeah, that's me! Where are you?  
Voice: Down here.

_Fry goes to where the voice came from and picks us a dusty jar. He wipes the dust off with his sleeve and inside there is an oldish man, about 50 with grey hair and a few wrinkles._

Man: It is you! How did you manage to live so long?  
Fry: I was frozen for 1000 years. Um…I don't remember you, sorry. Did I work for you or something?  
Man: It's me, Mike  
Fry: (Peering at the head) You look vaguely familiar but…  
Mike: Mike Clarke? We were at high school together?

_Fry recognises the head_

Fry: No way! You've changed since I last saw you.  
Bender: You know this guy? I didn't think you'd actually find anyone you know here.  
Fry: Yeah, Mike was a friend of mine in high school. He was voted least likely to succeed. So what have you been up to these last thousand years?  
Mike: I started my own business when I graduated from college. It made computers and software. I was a millionaire by the time I was 25. I just had to prove you guys wrong by succeeding.   
Fry: Hm, I wish I'd been voted least likely to succeed!

_Back at work Fry is talking to Mike, while Bender sits and watches. As the conversation continues, Bender looks more and more irritated at Mike._

Mike: So how did you end up frozen?  
Fry: Oh, an accident. I fell into one of the capsules when I went to deliver a pizza there. It was a crank call too.  
Mike: Well you chose the best way into the future, being a head in a jar is OK for the first few decades, but then it gets really boring  
Fry: Why'd you do it anyway?  
Mike: I was stupid, I wanted to live forever. But for nearly 1000 years I've been trying to find someone who can stop me from making such a stupid decision.  
Fry: Umm, isn't it a little late for that?  
Bender: Sure is! The guy's a loon Fry, lets go do something else.  
Mike: No, it's never too late. Not when you've got a time machine.  
Fry: (very interested) You've got a time machine? As in a machine to travel through time?  
Mike: Well, no. But I have got the plans to make one.  
Fry: You mean I could build a time machine?  
Mike: You probably couldn't, but maybe someone else could.  
Fry: (annoyed) what do you mean I couldn't?  
Mike: Well I haven't seen you for a millennium, but you were never a fan of engineering at school. The plans are in a safe at my old house in Old New York  
Fry: This is so cool, I'm going to build a time machine!

_A few days later, the whole gang is sitting around the table. Mike is on the table. The professor is looking at the plans. _

PF: In theory I believe this could actually work  
Mike: Or course it could, I designed it myself, back in 2025.  
Fry: Are you going to build it?!  
PF: Oh my, yes. Building this could certainly turn a few of my fellow researches green with envy. And it looks so simple too.  
Mike: Remember, the only reason I gave you this is so you can stop me from preserving my head in a jar for 1000 years  
Bender: Yeah yeah. I volunteer Fry to go to another planet until this whole thing is over.  
Fry: What?! Why would I do that?  
Bender: Oh, no reason. Just for something to do. This time travel stuff looks pretty boring to me. I'll go with you if you want.  
Leela: I think Bender is worried that if you go into the past, you might not come back again.  
Fry: Really Bender?  
Bender: No…well yeah.. But no. You were saying you missed your 20th century buddies though.  
Fry: Not as much as I'd miss you guys if I stayed there.  
Leela: Aww, that's sweet.

_Fry blushes_

PF: Lets get started then

_A few weeks later. Everyone stood around a silly looking time machine. It is a quite big grey metal cube with a door at one side and some lights flashing around the edges._

Bender: Wow, so this thing will actually travel in time?  
PF: If Mr. Clark's calculations are correct. I followed his plans exactly.  
Fry: (trying to open the door) Can I go now?  
PF: I believe so. Everybody in!

_Everyone heads for the door at the same time_

Fry: Hold on everyone, we can't all go.  
Bender: Why not? It's plenty big enough  
Fry: Because Leela and Zoidberg are aliens and you're a robot.  
Zoidberg: I want to see the 21st century!   
Bender: We could wear disguises  
Fry: (thinks for a moment) OK, but you'll probably have to do a lot of hiding in the time machine.  
Leela: I'm not sure I want to go…  
Amy: C'mon Leela, it'll be fun  
Leela: I've got some stuff I really should be doing.  
Fry: Leela, it's a time machine. We can arrive back before we leave if you want and you'll have even more time.  
Leela: (defeated) all right then  
Fry: Great! In we go.

_Everyone gets into the time machine except the professor and Hermes._

Fry: You guys not coming?  
PF: Oh my, no. Time travel is very dangerous. The thing might explode.  
Hermes: I prefer to stay in my own time thanks mon.

_The door closes_

Leela: (quietly) Now why didn't I just say something like that?  
Fry: So, when too?

Amy: 2342!  
Bender: 2701!  
Zoidberg: Last Tuesday!  
Fry: We've got to go to before Mike preserves his head…I guess I'll choose the date.  
Leela: How about just after you were frozen. The world will be similar to how you left it  
Fry: Great!

_Fry types in 12/31/00 onto a number pad and the numbers appear in huge red digital clock style on the wall. _

Fry: One year after I was frozen

_He goes to hit a button saying 'initialize' but Leela stops him_

Leela: Wait, we were going to get disguises  
Bender: I've got one (pulls out his gorilla mask from the episode with Fry's ex)  
Amy: Did they have gorillas wondering around New York 1000 years ago?  
Fry: No, but Bender's given me a idea

_Fry changes the date to 10/31/00_

Amy: 2 months earlier? What difference does that make?  
Fry: Halloween!

_Amy still looks puzzled, so does everyone else._

Fry: You guys don't do Halloween? Well, you'll see.

_Fry hits the button and everything starts swirling around, getting more and more blurred until it all disappears. Then it starts to materialise again, showing everyone except Bender passed out on the floor. _

_Bender is finishing off a can of beer and everyone else is laying on the floor. The gang comes too and starts looking around, puzzled._

Amy: What happened?  
Bender: I think we're there. Get up everyone, I want to explore.

_Bender puts on his mask and heads to the door. Everyone groggily gets up and follows him. The door opens slowly. As it does Fry can hardly contain his excitement. He is practically jumping oupand down. When the door is fully open everyone piles out of the time machine and Leela presses a button on a remote control that makes the time machine invisible._

Fry: Wow, I didn't know it could do that!  
Amy: So, Fry, are you going to show us around?  
Fry: Sure, this way!

_The time machine has landed on the sidewalk in a deserted looking part of New York, but Fry seems sure of where he is going. It is quite early, about 9 am. There is the sound of cars not too far away._

Leela: Fry, disguises…  
Fry: Don't worry about it, it's Halloween, everyone'll be dressing up tonight.  
Zoidberg: It's the daytime  
Fry: Yeah, I didn't think of that when I thought of this. It anyone asks, you couldn't wait to get your costumes on. C'mon, I want to show you around.

_It is a little later, everyone is sat in a McDonald's or some similar fast food place eating burgers and fries, except Bender, who is downing beer._

Amy: So this is old New York. It's different to how I imagined.  
Fry: How'd you imagine it?  
Amy: I don't know. It's as dirty as I thought, the people are as rude. I guess it's just different to New New York.  
Leela: I thought there'd be a museum, or something. All you've shown us is bars and fast food joints.  
Zoidberg: And that green bit.  
Fry: Yeah, I showed you Central Park  
Bender: You pointed at it from across town.  
Fry: Yeah. And there are museums somewhere. I just thought everyone would prefer the interesting things.

_Everyone nods in agreement._

Fry: See.  
Someone: Fry!

_Everyone turns around looking for where the voice came from. There is a man about Fry's age dressed in a uniform of the restaurant they are in, waving frantically at Fry._

Fry: Jimmy?

_Jimmy runs over to their table_

Jimmy: Hey, it is you man! I wasn't sure. Where've you been for the past few months?  
Leela: (whispering) Think fast Fry.  
Fry: Oh…I had to leave town. Had some…stuff to do.  
Jimmy: When you disappeared we all wondered where you'd gone. Dan thought you'd got a huge new year's tip and ran off to spend it. Did you?  
Fry: Ah…no. didn't even get a little tip. It was a crank call.  
Jimmy: Bummer, I hated those. Now I've moved up in the world. I serve the food here, don't even have to leave to deliver an order.  
Fry: That's great. I'm still doing deliveries.  
Jimmy: So, like what's going on here? Early Halloween party?  
Fry: Yeah. (points to Bender) This is Be…um, Ben, (points to Leela) Leela, (points to Zoidberg) Zack, (points to Amy) and Amy.  
Jimmy: Great costumes you three  
Leela/Bender: Thanks  
Zoidberg: I made it myself.  
Jimmy: Well, I'm on duty so I'd best get back to work. You lot should come to Louie's party tonight though. Everyone's gonna love those costumes, and you can tell us what you've been up while you've been away.  
Fry: Great. I'll try my best. Got some stuff to do tonight though. That's why we're having the party now.  
Jimmy: OK, well you know where he lives, he hasn't moved. And if you don't come, send me your address sometime.  
Fry: Sure.

_Jimmy wonders off back to behind the counter. Fry is sitting back grinning._

Fry: It's great to see an old friend again. We can go to the party, right?  
Leela: I suppose so, as long as we warn your other friend first.  
Fry: Right. So if you want to go find a museum or something, I'll warn him and we can meet up later for the party. Amy'd best get a costume too if she can find one, it's a bit late though. There might not be any left.  
Leela: We meet here at half past 4.  
Fry: Deal.

_Leela, Amy and Zoidberg leave together to find a museum. Fry and Bender sit for a few seconds then they get up and go too. They walk down the road to a phone booth. Fry gets in to ring the operator. _

Bender: Fry…isn't that a suicide booth?  
Fry: No, it's a phone booth, you make phone calls from here  
Bender: Weird  
Fry: Not as weird as suicide booths, I nearly got killed on my first day in the future.

_Fry dials the number_

Fry: Hi, I'm looking for the number and address for a Mr. Michael Clark. Uh hu. Right, just tell me all of them then.

_He takes a pen out of his pocket and starts scribbling addresses and numbers all over his hand _

_Leela, Amy and Zoidberg are sat on a bench outside a museum. Amy has found a costume, she is wearing a pink ballerina outfit. The people walking past are giving them a few funny looks._

Amy: This century is weirder than I thought  
Leela: It's certainly different. I really am amazed they got out alive. It's hard to believe Fry grew up in these times.  
Amy: I know what you mean, sometimes I forget he's not from our time.  
Leela: It's like he fits in so well. Almost like he was meant to be there, like he was born in the wrong century or something. I can't help wondering how well I'd do if I woke up in the year 4000.  
Amy: Maybe Fry's just weird  
Leela: I don't like the word 'weird'. I prefer unique…

_Fry is still talking on the phone, but now to someone else_

Fry: OK, thanks anyway. There's only one left. This had better be him or I don't know how we'll find him.  
Bender: Go for it

_Fry puts in a coin and dials a number from the scribble on his hand, waits while it rings and finally speaks._

Fry: Hi. I'm looking for Mike Clark. No, why would I need an appointment to talk to someone on the phone for 2 minutes. Fry, Philip Fry, I'm an old friend of his from school and I REALLY need to talk to him. Right. (to Bender) his secretary put me on hold, and they're playing really bad music at me.

_Fry waits for a few more seconds_

Fry: Hi. What? Did you tell him who I was? Try again then. You told him how urgent it was? Fine. He wouldn't even talk to me  
Bender: Oh well. Lets go do something else.  
Fry: No, we've got to do this. I've got an idea, you go find a post office and get a stamp and an envelope. I'll write him a note, then it's up to him whether he reads it.

_Fry gives Bender some money and Bender wonders off. Fry scribbles something on a scrap of paper he finds in his pocket. _

_Later the gang meet up back at the fast food joint. It looks like Jimmy isn't there anymore, or he isn't talking to Fry if he is. Everyone is eating again._

Leela: So you told Mike?  
Bender: Yep. Don't know if he'll believe us, but we told him  
Leela: what did he say?  
Fry: Oh, probably something like 'thanks for the info, I don't believe you.'  
Leela: Probably?  
Bender: Definitely. That's what he said.  
Fry: So, I think we should get to the party about 10. Shall we go to a bar till then?  
Bender: Sounds good  
Leela: We'll have to be careful, we're running out of the counterfeit 21st century money the professor gave us.  
Fry: We've got nearly a hundred left  
Leela: 52 dollars isn't nearly a hundred  
Fry: it is to me.  
Bender: If we run out we'll just steal some, crime was very popular in the 21st century, no one will notice.  
Fry: Yeah, or we could go trick or treating.

_Everyone gives him a funny look_

Fry: Or not. Let's go anyway

_They all get up and leave _

_Later at the party Fry is chatting to a girl dressed as an alien._

Fry: You know, I'm from the future.  
Girl: Really? I'm from outer space  
Fry: I've seen real aliens, they don't look anything like you though, you're much prettier.  
Girl: Okay.  
Fry: There's aliens here too. See that guy, he's an alien

_He points at Zoidberg._

Girl: That's great, I've got to go now.

_She walks out the door. Fry shrugs and wonders off. Outside, the girl presses a fake looking Star Trek style communicator badge._

Girl: Beam me back up, this planet is full of crazy people

_She disappears. _

_Leela and Amy are stood near the door talking to each other, both holding weird looking cocktails. A guy at the other side of the room looks at Leela and smiles. She smiles back and Amy watches jealously._

Leela: Y'know, this century isn't half as bad as I thought it would be.  
Amy: Well I think it's stupid. What's the point of all this dressing up anyway?  
Leela: It's just to have a bit of fun. It was a good idea of Fry's to come to this date. Amy: Probably the only good idea he's ever had.

_They both laugh. Leela looks up at the guy that smiled at her, he's standing next to someone in a costume that looks a bit like Kif._

Amy: Maybe this century isn't as bad as I thought.

_They both make their way over to they guys, but just as they are about to speak to them, a girl screams and Fry and Bender rush across the room, grabbing them and dragging them outside. Zoidberg runs after them, waving his arms around in a panic_

Leela (angry) What did you do that for?  
Fry: Bender frightened a girl, we thought we'd better get going  
Bender: It wasn't my fault. I was just talking to a nice robot girl, she asked what I looked like under my mask, so I took it off and she passed out.  
Fry: She probably wasn't expecting you to be a robot. She was a human in a costume  
Bender: (horrified) I was chatting up a human?!  
Leela: I think we've had about all the fun the 21st century has to offer, maybe we should be getting home.  
Amy: But what about those cute guys at the party  
Leela: Amy! What about Kif?  
Amy: What? He hasn't even been born yet.  
Leela: We've done what we came here to do, pretty soon Halloween's going to be over anyway, we might as well leave.  
Fry: (disappointed) But there's loads more I wanted to show you.  
Zoidberg: Like what?  
Fry: This other McDonald's, and the place I used to work at, and loads of other bars…  
Leela: Come on.

_She starts walking off back to where they parked the time machine. The others hesitate but then follow her, except for Bender_

Bender: Wait, I like the bit about loads of other bars…

_Bender realises the others aren't listening and follows them _

_Back at the time machine, Leela presses the button on the remote control and it reappears. They all walk in except for Fry who lingers at the door looking out at the city._

Leela: Fry?  
Fry: I'm coming. You know, I know you guys don't think much to this century, but it's my home, I know it hasn't got all the technology and aliens and robots of the 31st century, but it's a pretty great place.

_At the end to the ally a man runs past, followed by two other men shooting at him. Fry ends his nostalgia trip pretty quickly and dives into the time machine. It fades away like it did before. It reappears in the year 3000. Everything looks exactly how it did when they left, except Mike's head looks younger, about 25-30. The door opens and they all stagger out. Fry looks at Mike, puzzled._

Fry: Hey, what's going on?  
Mike: You didn't change anything! I'm still a head in a jar!  
Fry: Yeah, but when we left you were an old guy  
Hermes: No he wasn't!  
Leela: Something very strange it going on here. Mike, what did you ask Fry to do in the past?  
Mike: To find the guy who wrote me this stupid note and stop him.

_On the table next to Mike is a note. Leela picks it up and reads out loud_

Leela: 'Dear Mike, whatever you do don't get your head pickled or you'll be really bored by the year 3000, from F&B'  
Fry: Hey! That's the note I just wrote!  
Mike: What? But I sent you back to make sure I didn't get that note. That note is what tipped me off about it being possible to preserve your head. As soon as I knew that, I got it done immediately.  
PF: Oh dear, it seems that in the original timeline you sent Fry back to make sure you never became a head in a jar, and in order to do that, he wrote you that note, meaning that in this time line you sent him back to stop the note form reaching you without knowing that he was the one that actually wrote it.  
Fry: I'm very confused  
PF: Basically it means that Mike was supposed to become a head in a jar. There's nothing we can do to stop it, so when you tried, you just made it happen sooner.  
Bender: I don't get it  
PF: Fry caused the very thing he was trying to prevent  
Bender: So me might as well take Shorty here back to the head museum?  
PF: Yes, I suppose so

_Fry picks up Mike and carries him off. Bender goes with him._

Mike: Wait! Why don't I stay here? We could be friends again, like at school.  
Fry: But we weren't friends at school, and when I tried to call you in the past you wouldn't even talk to me. That's why I wrote you that stupid note.  
Mike: But we could be friends now  
Fry: Nah, I've already got plenty. But I tell you what, I'll put you on another shelf with some more interesting heads  
Mike: But…  
Bender: Shut it Shorty. Fry's got all the friends he needs.

_Fry puts Mike's head on a random shelf at the museum, then walks off without realising that the shelf if labelled, 'World's most boring heads' and walks off. Bender does notice and snickers to himself. _

_At Planet Express, everyone else is sitting around. Amy is still wearing her ballerina outfit._

Amy: So it was all a big waste of time.  
Leela: Not really, we arrived back here at the same time we left, so we didn't actually lose any time.  
Amy: No, I was talking about all that getting ready for the party, finding this costume. We didn't even get to say hello to those guys before Bender messed it all up.  
PF: Still, at least we've still got the time machine  
Amy: (brightening) Yeah, we could go back and try again  
PF: Yes, this will make me famous…

_Fry and Bender walk in._

Fry: Do you guys want to go back to the past? We could go to the moon before it became a theme park.  
Leela: Are you still bothered about that?  
Fry: No, but since you left me behind when you went on the new ride…  
Bender: I know, lest go back a few days and make sure we get here on time to go  
PF: Oh no, that would cause a temporal discrepancy. Fry found Mike and his time machine plan while everyone else was on the moon without him.

_Fry looks disappointed_

PF: Famous, world famous, universe famous. I'll be rich

_PF pats the time machine affectionately and with a horrible creaking noise, it collapses into a pile of junk on the floor._

PF: Oh dear, I thought it might do that. That's why I didn't want to get inside it. I said time travel was dangerous.

_Fry, Leela, Amy and Zoidberg look horrified, Bender just laughs_

End


End file.
